So here we do 2011

unlike past posts full of woe is me and how bad it is and all that ive decided to make 2012 something a bit diffrent or at least try ,
I am going to put down some goals and work towards them , will i fail? will i do even half of them? i dont know but i have to try , for without hope i am but a shadow of a shadow ,
This is the year of the dragon and i will coil the serpent around my fingers for a change instead of chasing it. So wha i am i doing you ask with baited breath? well for starters my self and slave will be losing some weight , i need to lose about 30 kgs im sure slave wants to look even more fab than she dose , i am going to look into more kink ware to make or build , i also like to try to find slave a bi playmate , no im not looking for full time but if she can have someone that she can enjoy that side of her , give her the best of both words in some ways , I feel postive  i can find someone that works and could fit in ,
and thats it i feel positive for the first time in some time i feel like it can all work out that i can be more than i have been , not sure if its the caffine in my sstem or the fact im listening to rammstein lol but i feel if i work hard and play right i can do anything ,

who watches the watcher ?

im unhappy , i feel like curling into a ball and just telling the universe to go away , and yet im not sadden as much with my brothers death firmly lodged in my brain , its more my failings as a master and a farther to my family ,
i feel more alone today than i think i could ever feel , no thats not totally true i am numb i can put the smile on my face i can wave my hand and say im good but honestly im not , i dont know what to do at the moment
I want to be more than i am i want to create but my hands my mind my being stops me , like a wall that i cannot climb , i see it all in front of me the ideas flow but the hands do not follow ,i look at things and say yes but its no ,
i feel with my knees so sore my weight gain my lack of skills im a dead weight to this family , my only hope is skills , i need to be re trained to  transform into smoething more that what i am now , all my life i just worked i had to work and yet i want to be greedy i want to choose a job this time not just take anything , problem is what , security is all ive done , i wouldnt know what do even look at ,woodworking, welding .... leather work ? i have books of leather fasion ideas i have books full of bdsm kink ideas but my hands fail me to create them , i have become numb , so for now im sure slave is in the other room waiting for my post and bubba is behind me crying dad i want out theres no food in here , i will sum up
all my life in warhammer or models ive created i loved it i make stuff out of junk , i look at all these great kink ideas and want to make them in indulge my senses but i feel ive hit a wall , i dont have any skills to make them and could i do it to make money too ? is there a market i can do in perth to make these items and live off it or am i blowing my wang to the wind? lol
as for the remark who watches the watcher , i watch alot of these porn sites see these amazing looking ppl in exotic places being bound in some great and amazing items and all i do is watch , maybe its time soon i stop watching and act out my desire of this

the heat the hurt and the lonelyness

Well christmas is done and dusted and we had a blast , i got some nice new kinky ,,,,,, i dont know why im writing all this only one that reads this is slave , i dont have any freinds or even anyone that reads this
Its odd the more i hear about these freinds i wounder what my life would have been with them , would i have been a better or worse person?
I can understand the conecpt of freinds how it works .....................to a point , not ever having one i can only assume so much , at the moment i get most of it , someone i can go over have a coffee talk about this and that , talk "shop" with , but im not sure if i can trust some one im not sleeping with with so much, my kink lifestyle means i have to keep many things hidden and to be honest 99% of the kink ppl arent the type i want to know that well , ive been there and thhere all so clickly so , inner circle and back stabbing . i ended up being fearful of munches to be honest , the back stabbing mind control who is in and who isnt lol ,
For now i do feel alone, slae is great and her and the boy are my lil perfection , but i have to admit , i do want to try this freinds thing , it seems nice someone i can hang with .... and i want slave to make new freinds and have her go off do coffee and cake and the like

The heat the last few days has been monsterous , i mean fucking hell so hot i cannot even move outside cos of the heat BUT its worse now , im hurting and hurting bad bad and oh my god bad , its turned very muggy here and my left knee is hurting bad, normally to hurt this bad i would need to be at work for 12 hours and on my feet for most of it , but i woke up with it and fucking hell dose it hurt ,

Slave bought me this amazing book ,,,,,here i go again , slave is the only one that reads this and yet i assume im writing for a grop of ppl intersted in my life , its fair to say im a loner have been all my life , the outcast the forsaken , problem is now i want to try to be more , b ut i have no idea , how do you pic a freind and how dose this bond grow?

im outer my depths here , mayeb i just need to find a young Dom or sub and help them though there early years of kink talk them though it ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,no that wouldnt work they would go to muches hear im a serial killer or rapist or god knows what these days ,
vanilla freind it is and keep the real me hidden ,,,,,no that dont work cos im keeping things from my new freind , back to me world lol im not perfect far from it but i think its safer there untill i find some one who as slave puts it , trys hard to be my freind then i will try back hard . sadly i dont se anyone even trying lol

in the dark you see the brightest of lights

So where are we now?
Slave had said a bad bad word and had me very very upset, she wanted to be punished , so very much , but bye holding off on spanking her bye caning her bye giving her what she wanted did 2 things , allowed me to calm down as i never give a punishment when angry , and allowed her to need hunger crave it and that was a punishment into its self ,

So after the paly and 2 broken canes there was tears that the word would not be mentioned again , i hope not for next time i will break 5 canes on her body and mabe some fire play might be bough into it too ,
In my  mind a punishment should be just that , not a spanking wich is the day to day play for us , not a orgsam control that has her crying out to cum , this needs to be given hard and have her body feel it  for some times afterwards , i want every ache she feels even ouchie when she sits down to know why it all hurts , and that is because of 1 word , 1 word that got master very very upset and very angry,

But in the darkest of nights comes the brightest of lights and she has proven to me how much of a good slave she can be , so were become closer from this bonded more , more giggle smiles and fun flow into our lives like a river of kink ,
Im sure must look at what i write with a blank look , but to me and my slave were like 2 vines twisiting around each other , we are 2 of the same thing just  1 is a Dom 1 is a slave , to us this is normal our life in bliss happyness and kink and it is truly a gift from the gods.

So for now i say good day its the boys birthday tomorrow and christmas the next day , i look forward to all of it with hope in m heart and love ,

be well all ( not sure if anyone dose read this )

Master

travel in time and space

wowy what a week its been , ive been feeling rung out washed out dryed out and left to rot lol
to say its been a lil nuts would be a lie and to say we havent had problems would also be it , slave is feeeling a lil down and i  know someof it is the though of christmas without the boy , and i wish i could wack her ex in the balls and say oi listen to her pain BUT he has rights too , haivng a dauther (9) to someone else i know all too well the bum steer dads can get ,
I can only hope that her big uber shiny computer will dent that gloom and she can be the hammy girl with her new shiny . I also am annoyed with my lack of control with her , im not sure if its cos its cristmas or im just feeling the heat or what , i hunger for it but after i go off to work ( wich is a small amount ) theres only a few short hours before bed and to be honest i want to talk to her listen to how her day has been m, her fears hopes and dreams , she is my slave but as much as being my slave she is my love my kitty girl xxxxx
I think the days off will have more meaning once the boy has gone to bed , i have some worry about the new stoocks they are either too small for her or if i prop them up on a table too high , , we will see its all a work in progress

Master

As she sleeps

Well its been a mixed bag weekend , i had planned a sexual sensual kink play with slave however we decided to go to roleplay wich is fine i know she REALLY wanted to go , but now she feels guilty that we didnt get our time to be our kink selves , she dosnt need to feel like this , yes the time is gone and we can look back , but its gone smile and look forward to next time , dont dwell on what might have happened , I love my slave i really do , but its all about time magment , we have maybe 42 hours without the boy where we can just get our kink on hard core when i dont have work ,
Work is the pickel problem , be the time i get home it gives maybe a hour for eating and talking and its her bed time , she needs her sleep to heal her body , I do miss slave in her bubble but i also know the real world is ever pushing us into its relm so once again time mangament , dosnt me we cannot play just have to use the time we have the best we can
I should go wake her up give her a coffee and tell how cute she looks all snuggled up in the minky blanket lol
shes so cute
Master

back in the bubble

Ive written and deleted my post like 7 times in the last few days , but its been a case of i didnt like it or i feel slave will take offense to things i say, Slave is going through a rough patch with her illness and a bad bad hoopencough wich im still stuggling to get over , so for the most part all pla sadly is on hold
this is going to change shortly , it will be light more mental i need slave to once again enter the bubble and stay there , she has been very , nit picky of late and grumpy and that is cos of her illness , and ive allowed the bratty side to come out and time to nip it in the bud , its also time we took i think our place up a notch or 2 , i wont say how but slave will understand when she see's it , im going to make sure i can keep her in that bubble pretty much 24/7 , its costing me a fortune but well worth it .
I am a bit worried about slaves mental mindset too , ive worked hard and as fast as i can to get her a new uber super duper computer and do i get a kiss and a smile or the hammy hyper excited look what time getting ,,,,,no , im not saying slave is being mean , im saying im worried cos if i was getting a super duper computer id be checking the door every hour till it arrives and be ultra excited lol
So i think slave is really , i will double my efforts to make her feel her submission and my love

Master

back to the grind

Well looks like im back at work tomorrow wich means with such short notice i have to stay up late tonight , to try to get back into the swing of night shift , and feeling alot better , slave isnt too happy i MIGHT be working over the cristmas break , work are like a pack of jumping beans they say im this then that or this and then im here , so to say honestly i am working , lol im not holding my breath , i think they will likey offer it to someone and swap it with me so i dont get the freaking huge amount of money over tha weekend , but we will see ,
Glad to say cough is going down , i had a small play with slave this morning , 10 mins and  i was worn out but means im getting that old feeling back again ,
all in time i think , like my recovery from being so sick , i will get back on my feel , small play here and there so we can start that play we both love and that control we both hunger for .
So for now its good night, star trek night and i want to spend it with m hot lil slave
:)
Master

hoopen cough

this cough has really hit me bad this morning , i cough and i cough bad :( was up at 3 to start with cough really flemmy now very painful to cough , up at 4-30 as the cough was so bad i had trouble breathing while in bed ,
This cough has hit my plans for kink the the back door and then some , i miss the control of slave to the high level i hunger for but , this and now the fear of re giving it to the boy means any play has to take a back seat , sadly

So for now i will cough and cough and have alot of troble breathing and i hope in a few weeks i will be back fighting fit and my full control as per normal

on a personal note ( IF THERE IS SUCH A THING ON A BLOG ) THIS COUGH IS REALLY WEARING ME DOWN MENTALLY i say it in caps cos ive not been this sick in many many years , 1 thing master dislikes is being sick and helpless lol

Master

of mice and men

well the best plans i had failed and how , the flu has hit us all hard me most of all , i sound like in in a tunnel or something , worst part is i wasnt able to do the things i had planned for slave and now i fear she is out of her lil bubble , something i didnt want to happen , i feel some times i push my self too hard and sometimes i feel i dont ,
the good news is about 11 pm tonight the cristmas bug bit me lol i wondered what slave had gotten me and my mind wandered , ussaly i dont care , im a bastard to buy for and its hard , not that it should be a case of that will do or something like this or that , it should be about love showing someone love with a gift they had no idea about , i think the best gifts are when someone gets something they really need but never knew it , Im not saying my giflts are like that but i wish they was , anyways i got the christmas bug lol wich has its good and bad points ,
so for now , im sick of being sick i want christmas to come quicker and i want to spank my kitty girl and kiss her cute lil body

Night all

Master

in sickness and in health

well what a few days its been the boy sick as a doggy and i am unable to help him , to wash away his tears and make the fever go away , its not helped bye the fact im sick and so is slave , even now slave and i have been snipping at each other, she says hurtful things i pretend i dont hear or dosnt affect me but it all dose , i just dont show it to give her the enjoyment of knowing it cuts deep , not that she gets enjoyment , but im babbbling now .
In sumary were all sick here and snippy with each other , ive been very selfish today not focued more time in making sure the boys need s are met and he is all good , i sit in my own self sickness feeling sorry for my self, ive been a sook , i had planned all these fun little games for slave been doing some readng going to put her through her paces and now its all for shit , not that we cannot do it next weekend we have off toghter but i think thats the christmas weekend , 1 thing i have that has been helping me out and i can hear slave clenching her teeth right now , lol
WoW has been giving me a sense of relif , not that its bettr than slave but i can get all my negtive emotions out in a game that pretty much runs around combat and lots of it , plus there are new features so a 5 hour raid to just get started ( not including the raid) is now around 30 seconds to maybe 5 mins , and the raid it self , so far around 40 mins , wich is down from its usal 2 hours , this has been a lifesaver , i know most wont understand but , when i play wow i get a diffrent high to when i spank slave , its diffrent but the same , much like having her run about in the game with me , made me sooo fucking proud , i had my hot lil girl in a game i loved , to me its a dream come true and i know im sounding like a total nerd but its true ,
 So what dose that leave me with now?
up the creek pretty much , i have tio juggle my hot lil slave who i love so much who is sick , the boy who is so sick cos he cannot just say mumy i need tablets or mum can i get a drink , so he needs extra care and then there is me the big sook ,
i got up this morning and i hurt , fuck me did i hurt , but poor slave i could see the how tired she was , her voice just confirmed it more , im weak and sick but slave and the boy must come first . we havent eaten and im so weark but no hunger , i dont know im not making anysense
bottom line im a sook i need to give more than i am , slave needs her rest the boy needs to be looked after and im not pulling my weight ,

Master

the girl in the bubble

well slave in now in her bubble and it will be fun keeping her there , the problem is getting that mix of our boy and time for her , you see its not as easy as it sounds , our boy is totaly awesome and i want to play and be silly and have fun and such and so forth BUT the cost is slave finds me burnt out when i go to bed , so what is the answer do i pull back on fun with the boy , so slave gets more of what she and i need ? yes sadly in some was it dose , wich means leaving the awesome dude with mummy more than normal cos i dont want to burn out too much,
i will assume this means on line here or wow wich is fine dosnt have to be for long periods, just not full on 120% like it has been , i think it will also give me more time to plan play ideas and kink work items i wish to start once i have free cash ( when dose that happen lol) for now i need to focus in keeping slave in her bubble and my self happy , we will get there and im sure at times she will not be in her bubble but just makes going back there even more fun

Master

when you get too close to the sun

Pain would be a great way to describe how im feeling right now and tired not far behind it , its been a mixed weekend wihtout the boy, we had about 24 hours of total submission , it didnt go as well as i had liked , i feel im being too soft on slave and i had to punish her this morning, and a little this afternoon to remind her of what had happened when we woke up , but to be honest right now i hurt , my knees throb like my cock dose when i see her in her slave out fits.My back i dunno it stings greatly too , i put on a brave face but i do hurt , there is also something i fear , well a few things work and the like being shits , but this summer i do fear , unlike most summers ive wacked on alot of weight , last year i was 100 kg , now i dont know but i would say at least 120 to 130 , this summer is going to hurt , the hea will hit hard and i have to be up for it , the good news is slave will be losing it with me , ive planned a few swim weekends and beach fun once its just me and slave , plus minor weights to to help tone her arms up , nothing too great it will take time but hopefully slave will get that body she wants so bad ,

As for the kink in our lives, friday was fun in many ways and in others i lacked being the good Master i should be , i get so caught up in making sure slave has little to nothing to clean up when i should be holding her letting her know im there for her , sat was fun too but once again i need to give her more contact to let her know master loves her and is there for her,
 I feel sometimes im too soft or too strict or ..... i know i should just let my Dom side flow and let her follow , but some times its not that easy, i will say this much i love her company and its feels more right when im more in more control , we have the boy back and some respect i will pull back on the play just for tonight i just hurt too dam much , but i think punishments will stay , as for what i will do? depends on what has happened how bad it was ,
when you get too close to the sun you burn up , im not burnt up or burnt out but i feel like ive lost sight of how to be a better master for slave , im not sure if its pressure from work or my knees i just feel i should be doing more taking more control , i think while at work ( working nights now im going to study the rules and burn them into my brain , so i can be the totally freaking most awesome master for her ,
i love her so very much

feeling low

Ive been down a bit latey and its been worrying slave and i dont know how to explain it to her the why and were for's , to put it bluntly its not just one thing its a little of many things ,
 Firstly its christmas every christmas from age 14 ive hated pretty much , ive loathed christmas i put on hat fake smile that fake oooohh and ahhh but at the end of the day i go home and just hate the world , i dont think its chirstmas per say its all the hype all the must must must that comes along with it , we must be extra nice and extra freindly over this break , its like to cram a years worth of good will into a few days , it feels so fake i want to scream , also i think ppl horde too much food and go a lil crazy , i guess thats why i go a lil crazy lol , i also think many many years of broken dreams of christmas have left me bitter , yes im a srcouge while others at christmas are all fake smiles and ho ho ho , im not smiling calling them a ho ho ho , I am trying to get into the christmas spirt , but the more i try the more it feels fake , i will get excited when sams opens his presants and a gift to slave but the rest ...... im going to try i think its needs to be a slow not forced , i think once its 2 weeks till sams birthday i will be all chirpy ,

So thats one reason i guess i saw my dog , whom i call son with a dead cat in his mouth the other day , to some a dead cat big deal? my dog was bought up with cats lived with cats loved cats and was even fear ful , i never thought in a million years he would have killed one, it breaks my heart to see what he did ,also we have today bought home a new kitten and im going to aovid bonding with it as much as slave , it might sound cruel but its slaves little bundle of joy i wont let it favor me over her , i want her and kitty to be the best of buddys , i hope sometime soon i will be going back to work , will be nice if she has a little man to purr with in bed and sit on the couch with her.

Lastly and this i guess is the shocker but not really supirising wow im missing the game , i use to play it around 5 hours a day most days , even come home 6 am get on do my dailys wich take about a hour but these days im lucky for a hour , yes im sure your all thinking now , oh my god what a junkie and yes your right , but honestly i get a huge amount of enjoyment out of it , i dont play it like 17 hours a day like many in my guild , i have a lovley slave and a good lil man , but as i look around my deak i have wow , wow and more wow around me , and its something i am passionate about and i want more of, but i feel i cannot do it , and its not because of slave or the boy, its i have too much to do right now  too much work around the house and the old one too  , it know many would think im a freak , but think about it , im at home , im not at a pub drinking or meeting half drunk girls doign god knows what , nor am i out with theboyz getting up to god knows what , im at home on a computer having fun ,
but for now ive need to catch up on the washing and need to do this and do that and it needs to be done , plus my life is diffrent too and i need to adjust to that , before i could get up hope on line and wow my brains out for 5 hours get off eat more wow , washing and then dvd and so forth , now i have slaves needs and the lil mans long before i think of wow ,
i think i need to re adjust my times to play ,
writting this blog has lifted my spirts a little i must admit ,
So for now im oging to watch a dvd with my hot lil slave , im sure she will read this ( hello sexy slave)
i am very very lucky man i have a really nice slave ( lil freaky somethimes but a great slave) and a awesome lil dude i love and im a proud dad 
:)

So here we are

this will be a mish mash post i think..............well its just over a week from when we got the keys not even a week for us on moving in , its been hard with my knees this bug that just dosnt go away ( my voice is feels like its rubbed on sandpaper) and genral bumps and grumps, we had a loving weekend i played with slave friday sat and sunday , each time in diffrent ways , i want to do this as i want slave to feel many aspects of play and i dont want to have her know what it will be , like watching tv knowing whats comming on oh its a repeat , master will just spank me and there we go .
However poor slave is having a bad run and not feeling 100%
plus the fact her laptop died and her phone isnt going to be around much longer either, its beena bad trot for her the last few days.
Im left with a problem of sorts too , fear , im a prick to buy for my birthday and christmas i really am , to date only once in my life ive been shocked bye a birthday presant and boy it made my eyes pop out of my head lol , But slave says she has gotten me something that i cannot dislike and thats where the fear comes in , Dont get me wrong i will love it no matter what it is , the gift comes with love and that in its self is the good thing , but sadly i fear the gift , too many times ive been given this "amazing thing that i will be shocked or swept off my feet" and yet like i said that has only happened once.
I trust slave and she knows me very well , the item i will assume is a WoW item , yes i play wow alot i know im a total nerd but its my enjoyment besides slave and the kids ,
I guess i should be more thinking about a gift for her than what she has for me , and she isnt hard to buy gidts for but that first christmas togther i want is something lasting , i want it something we can look back on in 10 years and smile and think happy thoughts ,
well thats the plan lol
im tired and very sore and have work in the morning , as much as i want to hoon the net , lets face it my computer is here 90% to play wow and 10% everything else lol
i just hope i get some time off from work , im only working 4 hours but fucking hell it drags , and i just want to curl up with kitty slave and the boy and sleep
out lil family unit all happy
Master

my last post for a while

this will be my past post for a while due to having to move the computer and so forth , so whats been going on? moving and more moving and did i metion moving lol , i have some concerns for slave she was moody brumpy and well not well behaved , these are the days that will stress her out and this will show me in some ways how strong or not she truly is ,
For moving is going to be very stressful and hard , im sure she will pull though abd be better for it. Im doing my best to keep her not stressed but i have to admit its getting to me too , but i will be strong, the main bit for me is getting the new place set up , once the beds are put togther and computers up and running fridge has food and a meal can be cooked , i will be happyer , cos after that were over the half way mark , once were in the new house with the big stuff i will be  a lot happyer
I guess for now my 2 big problems are the movers tomorrow and the unpacking once the stuff has arrived,
but this is a good day and honor will be saved and shown , and my slaves inner love will shine and i shall feel her glow

Master

sound the drums of war let losse the hounds of hell

So the day before the maddness is here , the day of days the dark before the light , te dy of maddness before the bigger days of maddness begin lol , ok well its a day like any other and yyes i know what today is and means but im trying to be brave and do what is needed to be done ,
Tomorrow we get the keys , and thrusday we move the big shit and then we spend about 2 weeks unpacking cleaning and re cleaning and more cleaning , then i can sit back look at hot lil slave and the boy , have a cold drink and  say , its all us now family,
Hard i have to admit it is ( speaking like yoda now ............annoy you it might, hit me you shall , hurt me it might lol)
For now there is doctors to see packing to be done and have to arange time off work again:(
I can only hope when all is done its done , me and slave and the boy can truly be free :D

im looking forward to tomorrow the rules come into play and we start to play
i have a few ideas for more rules not that they will be talked about just yet , i need to unpack sit back in my new place and think more first


slave will be happy in the new place , its smaller and easyer to clean , but i guess its easyer to get dirty
we will be fine im sure

Master

time to live time to die time to be reborn

Its a sunday and its time to pack up even more stuff , clothes or the computer room i think ,but its fitting i think much like meeting slave and the boy , Fate or an act of god or the gods , put us togther , we both knew something primal had drawn us togther , we mix in the same circles know the same ppl and yet had not met , Funny i dont know where i would be if i had not met her , but i have and im happy and thats the importnat thing,
Fate as i said seems to be working her magic , its fitting the day before we get keys to our new home our new life our new start , i have a dark dark day , this day is more a day of personal shame , i married someone i didnt love , to me that is my greatess shame and no amount of drink or crying or anything it will ever make it right , mosts of the shame to her , we got married on her birthday , forever will she rember that her birthday was also a broken mariage , i will be up late tonight i will cry most like and i will beat myself up , but its my path i walk it and walk it i shall , however the next day is to be reborn , to become something better something that comes from the ashes and starts fresh , the move will be hard and stress us all but in the end , it will be for  the better :) we will have a new home with a big back yard new life in a smaller house but a house we have togther .

so its a new path

To bolding go where most have gone before , New house BUT new lifestyle changes, the new house will mean the dawn of a new set of rules slave and i have been working on , these rules will the be foudation that will grow and grow and from that will build the slave 24/7 she wants to be and i want to control , the new house has many mertis , smaller so it will be easyer for slave to keep clean , her dream kitchen too with the "island" , but its more than a small house to keep clean its our place as we forge a new life for our selves , from this i hope we can become more and more ,
Salve has been going a lil crazy with stress and pms and other things , i have been doing my best to keep in dammage control , to make sure slave m knows how loved she is and i am up for looking after the Boy too,
Speaking of which i hit the lil guys head on the door , the guilt ,,,,,i was so upset i didint know what to door , i wanted to go out buy him the biggest big red car i could find , not that i have lots of money ,,,i think i have like $3 in my account .
I will get back to my ideas on the new house , the garden needs work , but with summer the longer evening and such this shouldnt be a problem , i think a few hard core days to really just clean it up , and get the soil back , and keep puppy out , will make a big differance to it , the soil dosent look too bad , plus some nice plants in the garden too , the jjasmine is a nice thing too , that will smell awesome in the night windows open with the smell running though the house ,
I think the house will be good also as no stairs , not for just my knees that are causing me problems but also we can keep an eye better on the boy , and there isnt so much roomfor him to get easly lost in ,
The garden out back is pretty cool , im really exctied about taking puppy over , poor guy has never had a place with grass before , he is going to be tickeled pink ,
the move will be very stressful and im sure things will come unstuck in ways i havent though of and im sure we will freak out over money or something BUT i am looking forward to this in a positive way , i think in time  we will look back at the move and smile ( hopeflly while sitting in a spa) and think my god were so luck to be where we are now .

This weekend is a mix and match of stuff, were packing and sorting , Slave has come up with a nice rule , if you havent used it in a while chuck it , sorta a purge to the new house i guess , and its a good idea too

shes a really good slave , im lucky to have found her when i did

long ass day

Today has been a long long day and some pitfualls along the way, I was mean to slave this morning , i shouldnt have been , but i wanted to see if she would respond to it, the other night i had to punish her for being mouthy and wanted to see if she had learnt her lesson or not,
How ever what i didnt think about which i should have was that slave had pms lack of sleep and just stressed like i am ,
Dont get me worng im not that good , my sleep patterns are all over the place , i cannot shake this sore throat and i dont sleep right with a blocked nose, i worry about slave , the boy and my daughter , who seems to be growing up long before she should, were about to move and some BIG changes will be comming both for slave and me ,
Im not normally a chirstmas person , i tend to avoid it for many reasons mostly , and i really hate to say it , but its true , presants , i dont think in the last 15 years ive gotten something i can look back and go holy shit thats awesome , i tend to just ask for vouchers , saves me the saddness of getting my hopes up and saves face with partners in the past, i know its a selfish thing but im honest if nothing else.
But i will try my best to be full of christmas cheer this year for slave and the boy , and for slave the new house will mean a new life for both of us , a smaller house for her to look after,
i admit i am really looking forward to starting a new life with slave in a new house ,
I just want our life to be perfect and give slave and the boy and girl everything i can and more
I guess for me i will never get what my heart wants cos im lucky i have it
a slave to love, a boy and girl to watch them grow and all the wow i can play .lol
i know i might sound simple but i have everything , and for that i am thankful ,
the problem is monday i think , it will be a dark dark day and i will be very very grumpy , i hope i can be as little as i can be for slave
for now im going to bed to snuggle my hot lil slave and dream of her and the boy and girl
soon we shall all dream in a new house

Master

My bad day too

Masters day ,,, man its been a nightmare of sorts , i kept waking up during the night with cold sweats , had without a doubt the most horrifc nightmates things they dont even make movies about , vos there that bad ,
I didnt get to be too late lastnight just about 1 am , its been hard of late in a lazy way , ive been told NOT to lift anything heavy not to do too much not to do this or that to help my kneels heal and im finding it vert frustrating, i want to move big heavy boxes move this here and there  and i cannot and its driving me insane , i feel like a big monster chained down, i cannot be whom i am , not to say im a big out doors man or i love to lift bricks in the heat or rain , but i want to do more than i am doing, Anyways back to what i was ranting about, i got to bed 1 am woke up 3 or 4 times in the night , i got up at 7-30 told slave to go back to bed, the next 3 hours was th boy full throttle , my head was beating like a jack hammer my body hurts all over amd i just wanted to run off to the computer and hide for a while , Wich is unfair , but a the same token i find it dose relive my head aches and i feel better after killing players in pvp ,
But slave has posted i dont do much around the house, and she is right im not working full time i do have more time on my hands and i should do more then pick up after the boy and bits here and there ,
will i do more? yes bt i have to admit right now im sore very very sore tired and my head hurts, but i must rember slave has all of this and the boy too ,
Masters out there rember as much as your the man of the house you must pick up the slack where needed,
I also think once we have moved there will be huge changes in all of us the boy slave and me will not have such huge stress over our heads , the boy will have a new place to play in with new rules and new things to enjoy , slave will have the "dream kitchen " with the island , i will be happy just a roof over our heads and play happy familys,
Once again i get side tracked , for now i have to admit i really dont want to clean but want shouldnt come into it , this house ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, this house when i moved in with my ex was to be the shinning star to be socail and have this life the ex wanted , now i see it as a place with stairs , its not my home its what the ex wanted , i see it all the time all the bad thoughts of what was once ,
the new house will breath life into us all

So for now , i hurt , im tired and i just want to have the money all paid up in front sighned the paper work and be moving into the new place

Master is a bit selfish at times , its something i will need to work on to be a better Master

the basic out lines,

these are for slave to read and ponder, NOTE: these are the start more to come and i want your feed back slave

the rules

general rules

first and foremost im to be called master at all times , if out in a social setting babes or sweetie are to be used , if were out and about lets say shopping master is still to be used unless there is a problem with kids and then the real name  is to be used .

slave is to ask to use the toilet at all times , unless master is sleeping or at work slave must if possible leave the door open , and not try to hide her self , within the toilet.

Slave is to always make sure her pussy legs and under arms to be smooth at all times , master dislike body hair so must be kept smooth at all times,

Slave has a facial hair problem , this dose annoy master and dose notice his vision is drawn to it when master should be looking more at her eyes and the like , Master is aware of the problem ,

slave should try to keep this trimmed or look at ways of keeping it gone for long periods , Master is not up today with hair removal products but please look into it ,

If slave believes she has done something wrong slave is to tell master a.s.a.p. , this can be something as small as being bratty on a post or buying something she might not have , to hiding a cane or other items not to have it used on her,

At the end of each night if master is home , slave is to have a shower freshen up , this shower is slaves time , master is happy to have slave take extra time to shampoo her hair wash her self down shave her self if need be and make the time for her to know that its her time to let that water sink in

Slave is then to come to master unless the boy is needing something , master will place usually 1 item of leather or rope or metal on her body , these are not to be removed bye slave unless its of importance like looking after the boy.

once these items are placed on slave ( whom is kneeling) then will wait for master to let her get up ,

Slave when master is home has a hour of her time this is for blogging reading and the like , this is free of anything within masters realm , if slave wants to look at cartoons or bdsm gear to cats so be it ,

Some days master will want to play with slave , or maybe slave might be a bit hungry to play , master will make sure bye 9pm most nights if any play will happen , usually most play will be light to semi hard while the boy is at home , this will increase when

it is just Master. For the most part slaves night with master is to be the slave ,

Food such as chocolate, and cakes are treats given at my Master's discretion and i may request them but may not get them . health is important , slave can make healthy treats for Master and him self as much as she likes

slave is to maintain the household is clean unless the boy is sick or needs extra care , slave is to keep on top of laundry , both washing and putting away, slave is to make sure dishes and general day to day cleaning is done

slave is to make a list for master IF things are needed to be bought , the sooner master is given a list the better, Master doesn't want to get lists 30 mins before work .

Slave isn't to reach orgasms without masters permission, this is a golden rule if this is broken master would be greatly upset, Slave is to never say no to masters cock in any hole he desires , master is aware of your fear with anal and the oral problems , master will in future

be working on these to make anal more enjoyable to slave and still give her that slave bubble and oral will be worked on more often , mostly to get use to large objects in your mouth and hopefully in time make me cum.

While Master is at work slave will be given other tasks , these are not the usual things like running of the house , these will be small things to bigger things in time , but slave will work on them and do as she is told ,this could be anything from

playing with your self but don't cum 5 times to insert the dildo into your ass and sit on it for a hour , things like this to let you know master is still in control.

Master will also be looking into different positions for slave to sit in , Master has or use to many gorean books and sites , these will be more looked into

Masters special tricks

i have several ideas for slave in the pipeline these are both rewards and play ideas , some of them have been motioned buy you some ive been reading for years

However master dose like the charm idea, so slave will be getting soon a bracelet, once slave has mastered something hard ( your not going to get them for easy things ) and the thing you can do 5 times with ease

slave will get a charm to prove how great she is , the meaning of the charm known only to us.

the list dose becometh real

ive started in my head and soon text on a computer the list of things for sub to do day to day , these are not things to be done on weekends or days without the boy but on a daily basis both when the litte one is up and when he is in bed and when im at work , this list of course will change and grow as we do as a couple , the end result i hope will be a list that slave can easly work with and in time grows longer .

Master

food/thoughts and slave

last night slave was still a bit hungry , i knew from the moment before she asked what was on her mind , i went to the fast food down the road got a nice hot fudge sunday with extra choc , and as a treat for the treat a box of cookies , Slave was so happy to see the box , sadly Master wasnt even offered one , not that master needs permisson but it is nice when slave gets on her knee's and put the item up in the air to say "master please have some" but it was a nice night.
I think for the most part im going a bit softer with slave than i should, i dont want to be too demanding too soon , i am like i said at the start easing her into this , i think if little things week after week work better than a huge bible of rules for her to learn all at once . Slave seems to be doing well , but i will write a list , and i feel a long long list too on day to day living and chores to do , but this will be split , of course to wether kids are around, its not going to be easy and im sure i will miss bits but we will see how we do , for now i let my mind wander to what i want need and desire ,
I think for the most part i will do the list of things to do while at work , but im not sure if i will do like 5 general rules and then do it on like monday wensday and friday you do this , or it will be diffrent from night to night , As i said my mind wanders

Master

So where from here

So i sit here thinking were do we go from here? with the Moo we are limmited on our play we have to keep it alot more discreet, but at the same time we both want more , i think over the next few weeks im going to try to work out litte things i can put into our day to day life see how we do .
! thing i missed from the last 24 hours is good conversation
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Master

hello my kitty

So kitty here we are just after 24 hours , we have both fucked up a few of them but it was allways going to be that trial run , i think it was alot of fun and im sure you loved it too , what i hope is you get more postives and greater understanding of who you are as a slave and how truly amazing you are,,,,,, hope your bum feels better soon , i want to hear from you on what you liked and didnt , what thrilled you more than anythinge else

Master xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx